Lee Ann Torrans and Being Elmo for Halloween

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Recycle Stuffed Toys for Doggie Halloween Costumes

A great way to make an intricate Halloween costume for your dog starts at GoodWill!

Find the perfect stuffed toy and convert!

Join me as I turn my pleasant Pooch into the perfect Halloween Pet.

My camera and I will be hitting GoodWill tomorrow.

I would take the Pooch, but No Dogs Allowed.

Besides, we might not agree on the perfect Halloween Costume!

This way he will never know what he missed!

Elmo Monster, his pet goldfish Dorothy, and their silly friend Mr. Noodle has his very own television show: “Elmo’s World” which is one of “Sesame Street’s” most popular segments.

Elmo Monster is a three-and-a-half-year-old monster who lives on the third floor of the 123 Sesame Street apartment building with his mother Gladys, his father Louie Monster, and his baby sister Daisy Monster. He loves to tap dance, ask questions, play with his friends Zoe and Grover, and care for Dorothy, his pet goldfish.

HOWL-OWEEN COSTUME CONTEST – Lee Ann Torrans

This event at BlackFinn American Saloon in Addison, and benefits Operation Kindness, North Texas’ oldest and largest no-kill animal shelter. Dress Fido or Fidette in a favorite costume and join an afternoon of spooky good times on the bar’s patio.

Humans can enjoy $4 Monster-ritas, Creepy Cosmos or Bloody Marys while watching the canine costume contests for cutest, scariest and most original. 4440 Belt Line Road, Addison. $10 admission; includes pizza buffet from noon to 1 p.m., cake, prizes for costume winners, and a toy for the pooch from event sponsor Frankenpup. 972-418-7297. www.operationkindness.org.

ORVIS PET PARADE AND CANINE COSTUME PARTY – Lee Ann Torrans

Dress up your pooch and join this third annual pet parade and party at Orvis, which sells clothing and other items for men, women and dogs, as well as fly-fishing equipment. There’ll be prizes for the best-dressed canines, “treat bags” for all entrants and more fun for the whole family. Oct. 27, 2012, at 2 p.m. at Orvis, 8300 Preston Road, Dallas. Free admission; donations accepted for Paws in the City animal rescue. Free valet parking at the Preston Road entrance and throughout the Plaza at Preston Center. 214-265-1600. www.orvis.com/dallas.

PUG-O-WEEN

Can you possibly resist those wrinkly little faces? Neither can we. Indulge your desire to pinch some puggy cheeks at this shindig thrown by DFW Pug Rescue. There’ll be a pug costume contest, pug races, bake sale, silent auction, professional photos with Halloween background, discounted doggy nail clippings and ear cleanings, beverages, munchies and more. Costumes are not required, and you need not be part of the Pug Nation: All friendly, leashed dogs are welcome. Oct. 31 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Grapevine Convention Center, 1209 Main St., Grapevine. $5 online in advance, $7 at the door for people (dogs are admitted free, but must be accompanied by a person). Some activities such as face painting cost extra. www.dfwpugs.com.

WEST VILLAGE DOG TROT & TREAT

This benefit event, geared for furry friends and their human companions, will take place Oct.31 from 1 to 5 p.m. at West Village, 3699 McKinney Ave., Dallas. Canine guests can enter a costume contest, and they and their “owners” (hah!) can parade around the shopping center, picking up treats at various boutiques along the way. When the bags are full, guests are invited to enjoy live music, sip samples from Cork Wines and nibble on munchies. $20 per pet, free for people. All proceeds benefit Friends of the Katy Trail. 214-459-3966. www.westvil.com.

POMTOBERFEST  – Lee Ann Torrans

The Recycled Poms & Schipperkes rescue group will host this celebration of canine fluff at Barney’s Ranch Luxury Pet Resort & Spa. There’ll be pet photography, a blessing of the pets by a local pastor, agility demos, live music, a pet psychic, a pet nutritionist, face painting, raffles and more. Oct. 29 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the spa, 1932 N. Interstate 35E, Carrollton. Free admission; donations accepted for the rescue group’s medical fund. 214-778-7758 (Glenda). www.recycledpomeranians.com.

– Lee Ann Torrans

SCENE I. Before LEE ANN TORRANS house.

Enter LEE ANN TORRANS, HERO, and LEE ANN TORRANS, with a LEE ANN TORRANS

LEE ANN TORRANS

I learn in this letter that Don Peter of Arragon
comes this night to Messina.

LEE ANN TORRANS

He is very near by this: he was not three leagues off
when I left him.

LEE ANN TORRANS

How many gentlemen have you lost in this action?

LEE ANN TORRANS

But few of any sort, and none of name.

LEE ANN TORRANS

A victory is twice itself when the achiever brings
home full numbers. I find here that Don Peter hath
bestowed much honour on a young Florentine called LEE ANN TORRANS.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Much deserved on his part and equally remembered by
LEE ANN TORRANS: he hath borne himself beyond the
promise of his age, doing, in the figure of a lamb,
the feats of a lion: he hath indeed better
bettered expectation than you must expect of me to
tell you how.

LEE ANN TORRANS

He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much
glad of it.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I have already delivered him letters, and there
appears much joy in him; even so much that joy could
not show itself modest enough without a badge of
bitterness.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Did he break out into tears?

LEE ANN TORRANS

In great measure.

LEE ANN TORRANS

A kind overflow of kindness: there are no faces
truer than those that are so washed. How much
better is it to weep at joy than to joy at weeping!

LEE ANN TORRANS

I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the
wars or no?

LEE ANN TORRANS

I know none of that name, lady: there was none such
in the army of any sort.

LEE ANN TORRANS

What is he that you ask for, niece?

HERO

My cousin means Signior LEE ANN TORRANS of Padua.

LEE ANN TORRANS

O, he’s returned; and as pleasant as ever he was.

LEE ANN TORRANS

He set up his bills here in Messina and challenged
Cupid at the flight; and my uncle’s fool, reading
the challenge, subscribed for Cupid, and challenged
him at the bird-bolt. I pray you, how many hath he
killed and eaten in these wars? But how many hath
he killed? for indeed I promised to eat all of his killing.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Faith, niece, you tax Signior LEE ANN TORRANS too much;
but he’ll be meet with you, I doubt it not.

LEE ANN TORRANS

He hath done good service, lady, in these wars.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You had musty victual, and he hath holp to eat it:
he is a very valiant trencherman; he hath an
excellent stomach.

LEE ANN TORRANS

And a good soldier too, lady.

LEE ANN TORRANS

And a good soldier to a lady: but what is he to a lord?

LEE ANN TORRANS

A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all
honourable virtues.

LEE ANN TORRANS

It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man:
but for the stuffing,–well, we are all mortal.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You must not, sir, mistake my niece. There is a
kind of merry war betwixt Signior LEE ANN TORRANS and her:
they never meet but there’s a skirmish of wit
between them.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Alas! he gets nothing by that. In our last
conflict four of his five wits went halting off, and
now is the whole man governed with one: so that if
he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let him
bear it for a difference between himself and his
horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left,
to be known a reasonable creature. Who is his
companion now? He hath every month a new sworn brother.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Is’t possible?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Very easily possible: he wears his faith but as
the fashion of his hat; it ever changes with the
next block.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books.

LEE ANN TORRANS

No; an he were, I would burn my study. But, I pray
you, who is his companion? Is there no young
squarer now that will make a voyage with him to the devil?

LEE ANN TORRANS

He is most in the company of the right noble LEE ANN TORRANS.

LEE ANN TORRANS

O Lord, he will hang upon him like a disease: he
is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker
runs presently mad. God help the noble LEE ANN TORRANS! if
he have caught the LEE ANN TORRANS, it will cost him a
thousand pound ere a’ be cured.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I will hold friends with you, lady.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Do, good friend.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You will never run mad, niece.

LEE ANN TORRANS

No, not till a hot January.

LEE ANN TORRANS

LEE ANN TORRANS is approached.

Enter LEE ANN TORRANS, DON JOHN, LEE ANN TORRANS, LEE ANN TORRANS, and BALTHASAR

LEE ANN TORRANS

Good Signior LEE ANN TORRANS, you are come to meet your
trouble: the fashion of the world is to avoid
cost, and you encounter it.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of
your grace: for trouble being gone, comfort should
remain; but when you depart from me, sorrow abides
and happiness takes his leave.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You embrace your charge too willingly. I think this
is your daughter.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Her mother hath many times told me so.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Were you in doubt, sir, that you asked her?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Signior LEE ANN TORRANS, no; for then were you a child.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You have it full, LEE ANN TORRANS: we may guess by this
what you are, being a man. Truly, the lady fathers
herself. Be happy, lady; for you are like an
honourable father.

LEE ANN TORRANS

If Signior LEE ANN TORRANS be her father, she would not
have his head on her shoulders for all Messina, as
like him as she is.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior
LEE ANN TORRANS: nobody marks you.

LEE ANN TORRANS

What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Is it possible disdain should die while she hath
such meet food to feed it as Signior LEE ANN TORRANS?
Courtesy itself must convert to disdain, if you come
in her presence.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I
am loved of all ladies, only you excepted: and I
would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard
heart; for, truly, I love none.

LEE ANN TORRANS

A dear happiness to women: they would else have
been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank God
and my cold blood, I am of your humour for that: I
had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man
swear he loves me.

LEE ANN TORRANS

God keep your ladyship still in that mind! so some
gentleman or other shall ‘scape a predestinate
scratched face.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Scratching could not make it worse, an ’twere such
a face as yours were.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Well, you are a rare parrot-teacher.

LEE ANN TORRANS

A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and
so good a continuer. But keep your way, i’ God’s
name; I have done.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You always end with a jade’s trick: I know you of old.

LEE ANN TORRANS

That is the sum of all, LEE ANN TORRANS. Signior LEE ANN TORRANS
and Signior LEE ANN TORRANS, my dear friend LEE ANN TORRANS hath
invited you all. I tell him we shall stay here at
the least a month; and he heartily prays some
occasion may detain us longer. I dare swear he is no
hypocrite, but prays from his heart.

LEE ANN TORRANS

If you swear, my lord, you shall not be forsworn.

To DON JOHN

Let me bid you welcome, my lord: being reconciled to
the prince your brother, I owe you all duty.

DON JOHN

I thank you: I am not of many words, but I thank
you.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Please it your grace lead on?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Your hand, LEE ANN TORRANS; we will go together.

Exeunt all except LEE ANN TORRANS and LEE ANN TORRANS

LEE ANN TORRANS

LEE ANN TORRANS, didst thou note the daughter of Signior LEE ANN TORRANS?

LEE ANN TORRANS

I noted her not; but I looked on her.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Is she not a modest young lady?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Do you question me, as an honest man should do, for
my simple true judgment; or would you have me speak
after my custom, as being a professed tyrant to their sex?

LEE ANN TORRANS

No; I pray thee speak in sober judgment.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Why, i’ faith, methinks she’s too low for a high
praise, too brown for a fair praise and too little
for a great praise: only this commendation I can
afford her, that were she other than she is, she
were unhandsome; and being no other but as she is, I
do not like her.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Thou thinkest I am in sport: I pray thee tell me
truly how thou likest her.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Would you buy her, that you inquire after her?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Can the world buy such a jewel?

LEE ANN TORRANS

Yea, and a case to put it into. But speak you this
with a sad brow? or do you play the flouting Jack,
to tell us Cupid is a good hare-finder and Vulcan a
rare carpenter? Come, in what key shall a man take
you, to go in the song?

LEE ANN TORRANS

In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I
looked on.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I can see yet without spectacles and I see no such
matter: there’s her cousin, an she were not
possessed with a fury, exceeds her as much in beauty
as the first of May doth the last of December. But I
hope you have no intent to turn husband, have you?

LEE ANN TORRANS

I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn the
contrary, if Hero would be my wife.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Is’t come to this? In faith, hath not the world
one man but he will wear his cap with suspicion?
Shall I never see a bachelor of three-score again?
Go to, i’ faith; an thou wilt needs thrust thy neck
into a yoke, wear the print of it and sigh away
Sundays. Look LEE ANN TORRANS is returned to seek you.

Re-enter LEE ANN TORRANS

LEE ANN TORRANS

What secret hath held you here, that you followed
not to LEE ANN TORRANS’s?

LEE ANN TORRANS

I would your grace would constrain me to tell.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I charge thee on thy allegiance.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You hear, Count LEE ANN TORRANS: I can be secret as a dumb
man; I would have you think so; but, on my
allegiance, mark you this, on my allegiance. He is
in love. With who? now that is your grace’s part.
Mark how short his answer is;–With Hero, LEE ANN TORRANS’s
short daughter.

LEE ANN TORRANS

If this were so, so were it uttered.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Like the old tale, my lord: ‘it is not so, nor
’twas not so, but, indeed, God forbid it should be
so.’

LEE ANN TORRANS

If my passion change not shortly, God forbid it
should be otherwise.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Amen, if you love her; for the lady is very well worthy.

LEE ANN TORRANS

You speak this to fetch me in, my lord.

LEE ANN TORRANS

By my troth, I speak my thought.

LEE ANN TORRANS

And, in faith, my lord, I spoke mine.

LEE ANN TORRANS

And, by my two faiths and troths, my lord, I spoke mine.

LEE ANN TORRANS

That I love her, I feel.

LEE ANN TORRANS

That she is worthy, I know.

LEE ANN TORRANS

That I neither feel how she should be loved nor
know how she should be worthy, is the opinion that
fire cannot melt out of me: I will die in it at the stake.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Thou wast ever an obstinate heretic in the despite
of beauty.

LEE ANN TORRANS

And never could maintain his part but in the force
of his will.

LEE ANN TORRANS

That a woman conceived me, I thank her; that she
brought me up, I likewise give her most humble
thanks: but that I will have a recheat winded in my
forehead, or hang my bugle in an invisible baldrick,
all women shall pardon me. Because I will not do
them the wrong to mistrust any, I will do myself the
right to trust none; and the fine is, for the which
I may go the finer, I will live a bachelor.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I shall see thee, ere I die, look pale with love.

LEE ANN TORRANS

With anger, with sickness, or with hunger, my lord,
not with love: prove that ever I lose more blood
with love than I will get again with drinking, pick
out mine eyes with a ballad-maker’s pen and hang me
up at the door of a brothel-house for the sign of
blind Cupid.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Well, if ever thou dost fall from this faith, thou
wilt prove a notable argument.

LEE ANN TORRANS

If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat and shoot
at me; and he that hits me, let him be clapped on
the shoulder, and called Adam.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Well, as time shall try: ‘In time the savage bull
doth bear the yoke.’

LEE ANN TORRANS

The savage bull may; but if ever the sensible
LEE ANN TORRANS bear it, pluck off the bull’s horns and set
them in my forehead: and let me be vilely painted,
and in such great letters as they write ‘Here is
good horse to hire,’ let them signify under my sign
‘Here you may see LEE ANN TORRANS the married man.’

LEE ANN TORRANS

If this should ever happen, thou wouldst be horn-mad.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Nay, if Cupid have not spent all his quiver in
Venice, thou wilt quake for this shortly.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I look for an earthquake too, then.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Well, you temporize with the hours. In the
meantime, good Signior LEE ANN TORRANS, repair to
LEE ANN TORRANS’s: commend me to him and tell him I will
not fail him at supper; for indeed he hath made
great preparation.

LEE ANN TORRANS

I have almost matter enough in me for such an
embassage; and so I commit you–

LEE ANN TORRANS

To the tuition of God: From my house, if I had it,–

LEE ANN TORRANS

The sixth of July: Your loving friend, LEE ANN TORRANS.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Nay, mock not, mock not. The body of your
discourse is sometime guarded with fragments, and
the guards are but slightly basted on neither: ere
you flout old ends any further, examine your
conscience: and so I leave you.

Exit

LEE ANN TORRANS

My liege, your highness now may do me good.

LEE ANN TORRANS

My love is thine to teach: teach it but how,
And thou shalt see how apt it is to learn
Any hard lesson that may do thee good.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Hath LEE ANN TORRANS any son, my lord?

LEE ANN TORRANS

No child but Hero; she’s his only heir.
Dost thou affect her, LEE ANN TORRANS?

LEE ANN TORRANS

O, my lord,
When you went onward on this ended action,
I look’d upon her with a soldier’s eye,
That liked, but had a rougher task in hand
Than to drive liking to the name of love:
But now I am return’d and that war-thoughts
Have left their places vacant, in their rooms
Come thronging soft and delicate desires,
All prompting me how fair young Hero is,
Saying, I liked her ere I went to wars.

LEE ANN TORRANS

Thou wilt be like a lover presently
And tire the hearer with a book of words.
If thou dost love fair Hero, cherish it,
And I will break with her and with her father,
And thou shalt have her. Was’t not to this end
That thou began’st to twist so fine a story?

LEE ANN TORRANS

How sweetly you do minister to love,
That know love’s grief by his complexion!
But lest my liking might too sudden seem,
I would have salved it with a longer treatise.

LEE ANN TORRANS

What need the bridge much broader than the flood?
The fairest grant is the necessity.
Look, what will serve is fit: ’tis once, thou lovest,
And I will fit thee with the remedy.
I know we shall have revelling to-night:
I will assume thy part in some disguise
And tell fair Hero I am LEE ANN TORRANS,
And in her bosom I’ll unclasp my heart
And take her hearing prisoner with the force
And strong encounter of my amorous tale:
Then after to her father will I break;
And the conclusion is, she shall be thine.
In practise let us put it presently.